25 Proven Methods for Ruining Your Child's Music Education

1. Buy him/her the cheapest instrument possible so that he can "look forward" to earning a "better one."

2. Always point out ALL of his/her shortcomings; Never praise. "There's no sense in spoiling him."

3. Always call him/her for practice when the ball game's going best; call in a loud, demanding voice so his friends will feel sorry for him.

4. Insist he/she practice the most uninteresting music the longest. "You can't learn to play an instrument by playing tunes."

5. Insist he/she practice a certain time each day without exception. Lay down the law. "Either you practice when I say, or you quit."

6. Don't invite other children in to play instruments with your child. They make too much noise, waste too much time, have too little fun, and track in too much dirt.

7. Be sure to tell father at the dinner table how little son/daughter has practiced. Then he/she will won't dare leave anything on the plate.

8. Never help him/her with practicing. "I just never have time."

9. Add another hour of practicing when he/she has been naughty, or doesn't obey you.

10. Call loudly from the kitchen, basement, or any other room each time he/she makes a mistake. Add a punch line, such as, "Was that a sick cat I heard?" or "If you can't do better than that, you night as well give up."

11. Stop him/her if he plays anything for fun other than his lesson. "Music is serious."

12. Threaten, periodically, to stop his/her lessons, unless: (a) he practices much more, (b) he plays better than "so and so", (c) he takes better care of his instrument, (d) he gets better grades, (e) he makes his bed each morning, (f) he treats his parents with more respect.

13. Insist on PERFECTION in everything connected with his/her music. 100% or it's no good. "He'll appreciate this when he grows up."

14. Don't let him/her play for his friends or anybody else until he can REALLY play his/her instrument. After two or three years He'll/she'll be able to "surprise" them.

15. Take him/her unaware the first time you want him to play for someone and ask him/her in front of everybody to "play something." If he/she refuses, insist that he/she play; if he/she still refuses, announce that he's through with music. By all means, don't help select and work on a piece which he/she can play for company.

16. Don't take him/her to any concerts until he/she's old enough or can play well enough to appreciate it.

17. Insist that he/she take private lessons from the strictest, driest teacher in the area.

18. Be sure to point out his/her shortcomings often, especially in front of teachers and fellow students. It will make a better impression on them.

19. Rest your nerves after a long day be telling him/her not to practice where you can hear it. "Take that thing down to the basement. Don't I deserve a little peace and quiet?"

20. Insist that he/she can't take band or orchestra unless his grades improve in his/her "academic" subjects. "Band is just play anyhow."

21. Insist that he/she take Latin in high school instead of band or orchestra. "After all, Latin is required for college entrance."

22. Don't pat attention to his/her music making: you don't care whether he/she practices or not.

23. Use music as a wedge for getting other things done: example, if he/she doesn't wash the dishes every night threaten to stop his/her lessons.

24. Don't buy him/her a good instrument until he/she plays "real well." "No sense wasting money."